Leaving for Vegas...

The Beckers and The Fords are heading to VEGAS! Tim will be playing the penny slots while the rest of us get drunk and just play! My motto this week is: Ashes to Ashes, Dust To Dust, Life is too short - so Party We Must! And WE SHALL! As long as I don't melt in 115 degree temperatures! I'll feel like the wicked witch of the west from the Wizard of Oz - "I'm Melting! I'm Melting!" (I know - before anyone else says it - what do you mean WILL FEEL LIKE......my broom is parked at the back door!) I am not sure how much info I will devulge upon my return - cause as the saying goes - "I'm leaving it there!" Or something like that! Cheers and getting my slot arm stronger day by day...Diz

Thoughts for the week-end:

1. I signed up for an exercise class and was told to wear loose-fitting clothing. If I HAD any loose-fitting clothing, I wouldn't have signed up in the first place!
2. When I was young we used to go "skinny dipping," now I just "chunky dunk."
3. Wouldn't it be nice if whenever we messed up our life we could simply press 'Ctrl Alt Delete' and start all over?
4. Stress is when you wake up screaming and then you realize you haven't fallen asleep yet.
5. My husband says I never listen to him. At least I think that's what he said.
6. If raising children was going to be easy, it never would have started with something called labor!
7. Brain cells come and brain cells go, but fat cells live forever.
8. Most Of All, Remember . . .A Friend Is Like A Good Bra. Hard to Find, Supportive, Comfortable, And Always Close To Your Heart!

Mammograms.....

As one gets older (females), we are informed that we need to have our breasts examined. Not the kind of examination that we would give ourselves - the type of exam that they have written of in books on "self breast examination". That is a rather mild procedure. Now we are at the age of the Mammogram. It makes me think of a telegram, or now days - a fax. Yes - Our boobs get squished down to the size of a piece of paper - just like a fax! ("Fax Boy" would have a new occupation - one I am sure he would REALLY enjoy! Good 'ole "Fax Boy" - but that's another story for another day!) I truly think the Mammogram was invented by some man - no - a boy who became a man - after spending hours at a male only boarding school cause he was caught looking under the girls dresses with a mirror. "Damn My MOTHER!" that boy said - "I will one day get my revenge!" And he invented the mammogram machine! And not just the machine is all wrong - but the people who run those machines are like young ladies - barely over twenty - and more than perky..........ummmm - in more ways than one!..........ya..............that's what I wanted to do when I was young - flatten old ladies already sagging boobs - like slamming them into the refridgerator door - and then on top of that leaning down - just to give it that bit more mush - then locking it in place. Being well endowed - doesn't make it any easier - it just makes it easier to lay the boob on the "tray" in front of you - but believe you me - there is MORE TO SQUISH - and I don't think that I have had my boobs handled in such a manner since I was in Grade 7 and had a guy named "Bubbles" as a boyfriend...(a newfie - need I say more?) They should have trial runs for Mammograms....a "Mammogram Boot Camp" - ya - I'd be the first to sign up....DIZ